The world groans under it's own weight.

Self talk:
Wash your face, brush your teeth, go to bed, try again tomorrow.

I cannot take it much longer. I'm almost certain God is going to strike me down if I don't start doing what I'm suppose to be doing. and yet I resist a little bit more.

If I spent my last year of life in disobedience of what I feel is God's will for me, it certainly makes me ponder the assurance of salvation I have. How can I be saved and still love myself (even if that's through self-destructive hate) more than I love God?

I hate my laziness, but I'm too lazy to change.
I somehow have endured blow after blow, yet I still won't yeild; when am I going to break?
Would God, in a sense of mercy ever send down a death blow?

I'm going snow skiing next week, I'm scared the trees will be calling my name.

Will I ever gain control of myself?

it's the daily struggles that get the best of me
it's the daily struggles that eat away my productivity
it's the daily struggles that will be my undoing
because it's the days, weeks, and years of daily struggles that add up to the catastrophic failures in life.